June 2, 2005
Brews and blunders
What happened when two columnists met over drinks.
By Jill Brooks
INtake columnist

An email arrived recently, and staring at the sender's unfamiliar name, it finally registered that it was from John King, aka the guy over there, to the right of my column. He wrote to congratulate me for getting fired from all of those horrible jobs. "Good work," he proclaimed.

This intrigued me, so by all means we had to "meet for a beer," because unless you're "meeting for coffee," this is the only alternative. Proficient in blunders and chaotic mishaps, I suggested the opposite type of venue from what I normally would have craved: I chose a sports bar.

John's a guy, and guys like beer. I emitted selflessness in making sure there was a TV on the premises to boot, but I'd make certain we were sitting outside, so we couldn't see it.
Never underestimate a woman's thought process. Heavenly thunder, it rained, so we nixed the outdoor sports bar theme, darn it.

We decided on the Broad Ripple Brew Pub, and I like it there; they play good music. The waiter took our order and I heard myself internally coaching, "Beer, order a beer," but what released was, "John, here's the thing about me: It's a brew pub and I'm ordering wine."

He looked at the waiter, saying, "I don't know her, have never seen her before in my life." Except for a bad full-time job, recently exiting a relationship and living in the Castleton area, John seemed to lead a charmed life.

I instantly took an older sibling stance, cursing anyone who might attempt breaking his heart or cutting him off in heavy traffic. I was almost comfortable enough to push back an AWOL strand of hair from his forehead with my own spit.

That might have been the wine talking.

John is wildly confident, witty and bright; troubles probably roll off his laptop. He could make dead houseplants return to life, could make a dried-up Bic pen work again. We sat and shared life stories long enough for me to eat twice the amount he did, and drink two parts wine and two parts water. My bladder was summoning me to the facilities, but seeing the magician nearing our table, John and I (both out of cash to tip him) jumped from our seats and ventured the Monon Trail.

Briefly.

By the first bridge I said, "Well, it's been lovely, but I really have to go to the bathroom."
Such tact and delivery! A great first impression! With kind words between fellow columnists, we parted.