Missing

I miss Angie. Happy Birthday, sister. It's Pearl Harbor Day, bombshell. I was just thinking about all the times we hung upside down on our swingset, trying to get attention from the boys. We've grown up, some. :)

I miss Anne. I was just thinking about Fiona walking outside, holding a can of Comet, and asking us how to clean a bathtub. Sheez. Reality check.

I miss Debbie. I was just craving a stromboli (skipping French class) and a beer at Nick's.

I miss Alex. I was just remembering stomping on leaves outside the law school. Funny, funny guy.

This list could begin to get very long, but Sam is crying.

I do not miss a time when there wasn't Matt or Sam...

Christmas Exclusion

Uh huh: 4:02 a.m.

Although it's been said many times, many ways, Matt made note that Sam was overlooked when offered the simple phrase about kids from one to ninety-two...

It's snowing hard, it looks beautiful outside. Mostly, I love that I don't have to drive in it!

Freelancing has begun...

Clean Freak

Just an observation: when I cook, Matt and I both say, "Mmm, not bad," or "Much improved!" When Matt cooks I want to lick the plate.

We invested in copper pots...they really make all the difference as the heat distributes evenly.

I am such a geek.

Our next house will not have an old, gross basement with crickets (yes, we have a growing cricket population...and of course I will not kill them), nor will we ever have shower doors. No matter how extravagant and lovely the doors, they get gross with time, and I'm tired of cleaning shower doors.

I knew it was love when, at Matt's old house, I first cleaned his shower. I took the drain cap off because it kept clogging, and found a large clump of brown permed hair, which I had to cut off with scissors (it had never been cleaned). As I held back the throw up, I thought, "I think I'm in love here..."

Now it's just baby poop and spit up.

Hipster

As you may have heard, I have this thing for the Tragically Hip. I sent some photos of Sam, and Gord Downie wrote these sweet words to me today:

he's a beauty Jill
nice to read you settling into your lifelong love affair.
it just gets richer and richer.
he's a lucky kid to have a mum like you.
happy first merries coming up
happy days always
g

I told Matt that I can't wait to take Sam to his first show soon. Matt raised an eyebrow and grumbled something, but I was selectively listening. ; )

Sam's First Shots

Yeah, it's 2:36 in the morning; Sammy just had a bottle. I am congested, and it feels like I swallowed a ball of wax paper.

Last night I woke in a startling cough that lasted several minutes...enough to even wake Matt, which is highly unusual. If I need to get him up from now on, I'll cough. I got out of bed to get water, and right as I passed Sam's room I felt the dreaded tickle again. I covered my mouth with both hands and ran to the bathroom and cough-attacked into a towel. The things moms do.

Sam had his shots today - KILLED ME. His huge blue eyes looked like the sea in a thunderstorm, poor little lad. I held his hand, kissed his little cheeks and shook his favorite lion rattle while we both beared the pain. The pediatrician told me I needed a flu shot while I was there, and I had a horrified "Terms of Endearment" moment, but luckily no lump. Just the sore throat, cough, breathing passage out of one nostril only. Sam and I, we're survivors.

In The Spotlight

I've been weeding through old photo albums (I've had 3 glasses of wine, so bear with my spelling) this week, compiling boxes instead of cumbersome tomes. I found so many photos of my friend Eric, always at my side at the bars (my former lifetime), while I was next to some creep I was dating or chasing, always watching out for me. He's an amazing friend. The best, really. That guy would stop in the middle of his wedding (I hope he has one soon!!!) to come to my rescue, I swear. I love his girlfriend, too, but if she ever messes with him she has to reckon avec moi! ; )

Matt is cooking steak Diane. Matt is also amazing. The best, really. Hee hee... Our little boy is beginning the stage of humor, and it's fantastic. He thinks my slapstick is brilliant, which brings such joy to my heart. I choked today on balsamic, and Sam laughed. He needs to discern comedy from tragedy. Hmph.

Matt let me cut his hair last weekend...with shears! Holy Haircut, Batman! He has such trust in me (much more than...oh, never mind). He said he looks like Fozzy Bear. Speaking of Fozzy Bear, Sam is getting Tickle Me Elmo from Santa.

Wait: different TV program.

Eh, goodnight all. Life is amazing; the best, really.

Vino Italia

Cooked dinner (you don't "fix" dinner - it isn't broken!). Had a 1997 Fattoi Brunello di Montalcino. Am turning Sam into a proper wine snob. ; )

Reeeeeeeally can't wait to see Italy, someday...

Eva in Chicago - Thanksgiving

The cutest niece! I took Eva (Eh-vah; don't call her "Ee-vah, or you'll hear about it) and Sam up to visit the big Brooks bunch last night. She was looking at my Day of the Dead figures before we left, and I said, "Ev, those are from Mexico, they're called..." and she said, "Yeah, Day of the Dead. It's a day to respect your ancestors, but in America they've turned it in to a dumb holiday." I stood there nodding. This seven-year-old knows everything, I swear. Ask her about Frida Kahlo, Picasso, Miro...anyone. She knows. She's smart. She was telling my dad and me that she finds her gym teacher "a bit harsh." We cracked up. :) Love, love love her! She made Sam's bottles, held him and fed him. I took care of the burps, hee hee...

Barcelona Tapas

We found this amazing new tapas restaurant downtown; whoever owns it must be Spanish because it's very authentic, a true feel of Barcelona. The four of us downed $300 worth of wine and, basically, appetizers. The only thing missing is jambon hanging from the ceiling. Sooooo yummy. This photo was taken at Mo's, where we cocktailed first; I hadn't been there since I announced to friends that I was pregnant in January, after pretending to drink martinis all night.

We love going out with Jason and Beth. Rumor has it, we are planning a trip to Tuscany... ; )

Yes, sir, these are my babies

Sammy helped us select our rings this weekend! : ) I hate anything dealing with a "princess," (thank God we had a boy to avoid all of that) except the cut of my engagement ring!

IU Basketball Team 1936

Matt's grandfather (Fred) is #5 on the front row.

Jill's grandfather (Jake) is #6 on the second row.

Amazing!

Happy Thanksgiving

Shhhhhhhhh...Sam just fell asleep. Matt said, "Nobody move."

Destiny! Matt and I found out today that our grandfathers did, indeed, play on the same basketball team at IU. They're in a book about the history of Indiana University basketball, and in the photo Matt's grandfather is on the front row and my grandfather is practically standing right behind him. So bloody cool!

We had a wonderful day with the Brooks bunch; our 92-year-old-grandmother; aunts & uncles/parents; 13 grandchildren; 6 great-grandchildren. Grandmother Brooks is smitten with Sam right now, the youngest. A family full of girls, she said, "We needed another boy, honey." We missed Ang & Ev.

Shhhhhhhhh...Sam is semi-crying in his crib; let's see if he'll work through it.

Everyone is excited that Matt and I are getting married, and we're thinking more and more about eloping. I actually hate being the center of attention, unless I'm telling a really good joke or story and all eyes are on me. ; ) Walking down the aisle in a fluffy white dress: not really me.

Sam needs a pacifier; please hold.

He didn't work through it; Matt's holding him. Sam has us right where he wants us, but we're still very thankful.

Tomorrow night our terrific step-mom is watching the boys, and we're hitting Broad Ripple with Jason & Beth - an adult night out...can't wait! J&B are the coolest, and if they weren't family we'd still be best friends.

An Anthropologie store opened in my town; I'm walking on sunshine! I ran into a friend of mine as I was making my expensive Christmas list there yesterday, and he said, "So, what shows have you seen lately?" I replied, "You're kidding, right? I have a nine-week-old." I told him about hanging backstage with the Hip and the Who, and I'm pretty sure that trumped Ted Nugent. I always detested hair bands. Matt will rest on vintage MTV sometimes, and I ask, "Who's that?" "Um, Van Halen?" he'll answer, in disbelief. "Hmm, I was listening to Aztec Camera that year," says I.

Sam is cooing. We heard some gale force "wind" and Matt was quickly on diaper duty. Sleep is at hand for the travelin' little man. He was a super star today.

Randomness

Matt's brother and sister-in-law were on the Family Feud last week! I watched it, taped it, and laughed hysterically. Being on a game show isn't something you hear about --ever-- in Indiana. I, of course, didn't know that the show was still on; I lost track with Richard Dawson.

Sam and I raked leaves yesterday (Sam fell asleep on the job in his pumpkin seat). We're having the big Brooks family Thanksgiving, and the men are shooting clay targets on Friday. I'm a good shot, but we women folk must stay home, watch our children and bake pies, I guess. Sam and I will venture out and shop for daddy's Christmas present; we're the best team, and Sam is great at selecting ties.

Virgo me, I've already bought and wrapped most of my gifts. : )

Happy Thanksgiving...there is much for which to be thankful!

Tying the Knot

We're going to do it! Matt proposed and I accepted (over a week ago...I'm a little slow on the mention), and we are both so incredibly happy. We don't have a date chosen yet, but we do have a honeymoon destination: a little resort in Manzanillo Bay, Mexico.

Very soon.

I'm the luckiest...

What A Year

Sam had to have somewhat emergent surgery this week for an obstruction keeping food from his stomach. I told him we were taking a drive, and he ended up spending the night in the hospital. I hope he won't have trust issues with me.

Matt and I stayed by his side, and learned even more the value, wonderment and blessing of parenthood. I held Sam for 2 straight days, pretty much, was there every time he woke up. I got no sleep, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

The nursing staff at St V. fell in love with him; everyone who entered the room, hooking up wires and checking monitors, would stop and say, "Oh my, he's handsome!" He is gorgeous, and those tear-stained deep blue eyes broke my heart repeatedly.

He's home now and he's fine ... all smiles.

As good as 2007 has been for us, we're truly looking forward to 2008. A new beginning, the past behind us, a happy family.

And we're hoping that Matt's crazy, spastic and utterly helpless ex will journey to the moon and get stuck there. (I'm being kind when I say this). ; )

Merwin and Matt

How many times Sam spit up on me today: 4
How many diapers I changed: 6
How many hugs I gave: countless
How I feel holding him: wonderful

The thing about Matt...He doesn't talk a lot, but I wish he didn't have to go to work in the morning.

When You Go Away
by W. S. Merwin

When you go away the wind clicks around to the north
The painters work all day but at sundown the paint falls
Showing the black walls
The clock goes back to striking the same hour
That has no place in the years

And at night wrapped in a bed of ashes
In one breath I wake
It is the time when the beards of the dead get their growth
I remember that I am falling
That I am the reason
And that my words are the garment of what I shall never be
Like the tucked sleeve of a one-armed boy

ArteAngie

My sister's world...

http://arteangie.blogspot.com/

http://arteangie.etsy.com/

http://www.moonflowerarte.com/

PDA

Sam seems to have a sixth sense in knowing when to sleep long hours, letting his parents sleep off their hangovers. Okay, my hangover: Matt doesn't get them.

Matt and I had date night last night, which ended in amazing conversation and lots of kissing at the table.

Hold on to your hats...

Sam's Favorite Shoes

Trying to catch a shot without him kicking: impossible. I didn't have the camera set on "action," either. But you get the idea...the kid loves his mommy.

Political Follies

If the democratic party nominates Hillary for its front runner, I'm doing two hits of acid and jumping off a cliff. I don't care if she's a woman. So what.

Barack is our gift horse. Oh, how I wish we'd choose him: intelligent, eloquent, and full of ingenuity. And the photos circulating the Internet of him "refusing" to put his hand over his heart and say the pledge of allegiance...well, I know how to operate Photoshop too. You can't trust the Internet, you must know.

Either way, Bush will be put out to pasture, and we can all rest easy.