Bad Food

I was sick all night last night. Up at least 5 times with a stomach much like a going out of business sale: Everything must go! By the third time up, I was whimpering, "Matt...Matt," but he was sound asleep. By the fifth time, he did wake for a moment and ask, "Are you still sick???" He sleeps through everything.

I'm gearing up for a loaded plate tomorrow, though.

Happy Thanksgiving!

First Comes Love

Does having another baby mean 100% more work? The toys are already everywhere, so that part is done, but in considering a sibling for Sam, I have a lot to take into account. For instance, Sam is the happiest, most good-natured, great-sleeping baby ever. Number two could only, then, be the most rotten peasant child, constantly nagging me and trying to sell me Chicklets.

Like any other parent who’s had a second child, I worry that I could never love it equally to Sam. Sam is my guy, he’s my sweetie and true love. How could I possibly two-time him?

Then there’s the whole fat thing. I willed myself to get back into my size 4s this time around, but I’m sure after the second kid it would be entirely out of my hands.

And then there’s this little thing called education. Do we want our children going to the best private schools, or do we want to continue traveling at a frenetic pace?

As I sit here waiting for Sam to wake, I laugh at how only two years ago I was considering taking a job in Canada (writing for the You-Know-Who), because Matt was in need of getting his act together. We decided that we couldn’t live without each other; then came Sam, then came the baby carriage, then came marriage. I’ve always been a wee bit backwards.

And maybe, just maybe, don’t push me or buy me any more damn baby rattles, I’ll have another baby.

Job Search

I'm considering getting a job again, although Matt and I both agree that it's best to stay home with Sam as much and as long as possible. His nursery school once a week is good, but when I pick him up the teachers are always holding the "crying kids," a group with whom Sam doesn't associate. They are never reading stories or doing anything remotely educational; I think I may take him in and then watch through the window next time to see what really "goes down" on Toddler Alley.

I took Sam to the library yesterday for storytime, and he was the only kid who didn't want to listen to a story, wanted to run around and touch everything instead. He likes other kids, but he has no time for them. He's independent, not a joiner, on the move, and oh God he sounds just like me. I did discover, however, when chatting with other parents (something I really hate doing), that Sam was at least 5 months younger than most of them...but taller! This one woman's brat kept repeating, "No! No!" and I found out that she was 20-months. At first I thought she had decent diction for an apparent 9-month old (she was tiny), but "No" was all she spoke, and lots of it.

So, I guess I'm looking for a part-time job. Where? Every writer I know is looking for something to write. I was thinking about an interview I once had with Macmillan publishing for an editing position. They brought me in and interrogated me about my writing style and knowledge, kept passing me up and up and up the ladder to talk with more "important" people, kept telling me that getting a job in publishing would be an honor, because everyone is the best and the brightest (uh, maybe in NYC), and when I was sent to meet with the VP on the top floor, I sneaked to the elevator and pushed "send" to the first floor, and walked out to my car. I completely left them hanging and I laughed all the way home. I wonder if that guy is still sitting there waiting to meet me.

No, I cannot join. I can't be threatened into a position. I'm not easily hustled. If I wanted to be a hustler, I'd be a lawyer. ; )

Maybe there's an opening somewhere for a coffee/tea/almond/chocolate taster/photojournalist.

Back from the Bay

Boston was terrific. Beth and I spent a lot of money. Whoops.

We loved the city, and I took many pictures (Beth forgot to pack her camera!), but we kind of hated the people. It reminded me a lot of the people in Charlottesville, who would look at Jeff and ask, "You're from where??" Little did they know exactly where Jeff lived. They assumed everyone in Indiana lived in a pile of sticks.

The men of Boston seemed to like us just fine, but whenever we'd start-up a conversation, the girlfriends or wives would look at their significant others, like, "If you talk to them you will not be touching me for a month!" It was hilarious.

Bad fashion, too, also very reminiscent of UVA. Most women looked like they were wearing pajamas. I tried to take a photo of a guy's bulldog in Beacon Hill, because I wuv bulldogs, and he yelled at me. Seriously. He said, "Do not take a photo of my dog - we're kind of busy here!" His baby was crying in the stroller, and I so wanted to say, "Your dog doesn't look that busy..." I withheld.

The trip was awesome and I have a new travel partner! Matt took Sammy to California. We talked about 7 times a day. : )

Matt said the best thing anyone has ever said to me the other day: Everyone who meets you loves you, Jill, but especially me. My heart skips a beat.

The Bostonians

The Bostonians, a novel by Henry James, is perhaps not an up-to-date account of the city and its people, but I only got around to reading The Turn of the Screw (another, more famous, James novel) in college. I've done a lot of research for this trip; I swear, I could sit around and read the dictionary or any travel book with no intention of going there. But I usually do have an intention. I'm full of intentions. I remember the poetry man calling me from a phone booth in Edinburgh; I thought it was so romantic and told him, "I'm going there soon." I did. I love traveling more than anything.

But in studying Boston, I found that the Indianapolis high school, Crispus Attucks, is named after a young, black sailor who died instantly after being shot by British troops in the Boston Massacre. (I'm embarrassed -- I figured he was an athlete.)

This event, as we know, started a revolution.

I'm sure I sped past the Boston Massacre on my way to Vietnam in my history books, but "massacre" seemed tantamount to "genocide" in my mind: many, many victims. In fact, there were only five men killed in the Boston Massacre, and the British soldiers were--wow, shocking--all acquitted.

So I asked Beth how she feels about cemeteries. We're visiting the Granary Burial Ground, the final resting place of the 5 victims, plus other key Bostonians, such as John Hancock, Samuel Adams and Paul Revere.

Apparently, I am related to a famous Bostonian too: General John Endecott. In a nutshell, he was a Puritan beyond pure, governor of Massachusetts from 1641-1645, and started a war with the Pequot Indians. I think I'll keep this information to myself while in the area. Being family, I can understand the "starting a war" part, but the conservative, puritan part is a little out of my reach.

I live in a blue state!

It felt amazingly like a new dawn when I woke this morning. I stayed up late watching the results, and Indiana's still weren't in when I finally stopped crying from happiness, turned off CNN and went to bed. I felt ecstatic for black America.

A Republican friend of mine said that he hates handouts, that people should "just work hard" and everything would be ok in their life. It astounds me how some people still don't get it. My own grandfather, with a mere high school education, made a fortune in his lifetime, but this is a new lifetime, very difficult to pull that off anymore.

So if you hate handouts, social services and "freebies," don't ever call the police or fire department, 911. Those are services too.

I cannot wait to step foot on Harvard Yard next week. I want to stand where Obama studied so hard.

The Eve of an Election

I'm calm, although it's staggering how many feuds I've been in with Republican friends. I listen, they rant about Socialism, Communism and Terrorism; I'm quiet, and I say, "Let's talk about something else."

Some of my favorite people are Socialists. : )

I'm looking forward to going to Boston. I'm reading my tour book and circling every place I want to see. I'm embarrassed that I've never been to Boston because if its rich history, but I never really had a reason to go... What a great place to celebrate freedom from George W. Bush, no matter who wins tomorrow.

Boston, Boston. I wake up singing School House Rock songs!

The next place I'll research: Sun Valley, Idaho. I've already bought Sam his ski outfits.

Speechless

Matt's "Norma Desmond" sent him a link to over 100 photos of herself and new family. We were both like "Whaaaaaaa?" She'd be a laugh riot, if she wasn't five minutes away from being strapped to a gurney.

The Future Farmers of America were in town over the weekend, and a lot of them from California were on my plane coming home at 3AM from Houston. I saw the "Heather" of the group (I have no idea what her real name was). She was the cool future farmer, the boss of her pack, at the top of the pecking order in her small town. On her blue wool jacket was embroidered, "Historian" and "Treasurer." She was very important. I had to laugh because I've known some girls like that.

The Spooky Spider

Sam's first Halloween party.

Seattle

Matt and I just returned from our jaunt to Seattle. Poor guy was stuck in class a lot, while I sucked oysters down and drank local wine with local folks. Over the years, and through my travels (to Grandmother's house we go), I've become fond of going into a bar alone and finding my new best friend for a few hours. This time, it was a woman named D'Anna, a local bartender who drank with me one entire afternoon. She'd been married several times, several kids with different men, and her latest ex is in prison for almost beating her to death. She was very cool, a strong woman, drank cheap sherry. I love people.

Matt and I had a great time together. A fresh city view and a swanky hotel room always make our hearts pound a little faster. Traveling together is fantastic, and I learn more about Matt everyday. Life is so great.

I sought out fine dining while he learned (played Solitaire) new law tricks during daylight hours. I walked the entire city several times, and my calves are killing me! But it was worth it: I have a keen eye for fancy restaurants. I had the best Bouillabaisse ever.

We missed Sam, oh how we missed Sam. My mom flew up from Florida to stay with him, and he was fine, but still...the miss. I also missed my connection coming home because of bad weather in Houston, and I started crying on the plane. Yes, crying. Matt and I took separate planes ... for the obvious "keep one parent alive" reason, and my plane got home about 7 hours later than his. My heart was broken thinking, "In three hours I'll be holding Sam!" and then sitting at the airport (bar) for many, many more hours. I wanted that little boy in my arms.

I think Matt and I text-messaged over 75 times. Matt's last text: I'm home, Sam is fine, I'll wait on the couch until you are here with us. " I've seriously got two great guys.

I know, I know...

Not all babies are cute. I mean, obviously.

But Sam sure is. I almost wrecked my car today watching him in my rearview mirror. Ahhhhhh.

Matt and I are expecting buckets of rain in Seattle. Good! I love the rain.

Sam's New Tent

I think Sam will be incredibly creative (hopefully), and lately I'm afraid that the first book he writes may be titled: Mom never sterilized my bottles.

His follow-up book will be called: Mom used the wrong amount of Tylenol when I had a fever, therefore negating any relief.

Of course, the appropriate words will be capitalized.

Sam currently has a double ear ache, which makes me wonder exactly what is a double pneumonia? Both lungs? Two colds? Twice baked potatoes?

He's wasting away. He's only on the 75th percentile for weight now, 85th for height. I'm worried.

He sure likes his new tent, though.

End of Birthday Week

I just took a run at Butler, past the Persephone (Queen of the Underworld) fountain, past the turtles swimming in the canal, past the elderly Asian women fishing in the canal. Eek!

We had a great birthday party yesterday for Sam ... and me. I planned everything down to the most minute detail, and still had fun!

Matt got me great seats to Ryan Adams, so I am definitely looking forward to that date. It was a great birthday; Sam ate his cake and his birthday hat!

Sam received WAY too many presents, but he sure doesn't mind.

I love birthdays because everyone you once knew comes out of the woodwork. I have so many fantastic friends, and I appreciate them so much.

Painting I bought at Penrod

No Foot Fetish

I blew up a bunch of balloons today and hung them in the dining room. I was practicing. Matt said, "Those will be limp by mid-week." If they are, I'll blow up fresh ones before he gets home, because I cannot lose at balloons. (If Matt reads this I guess that plan is blown to hell).

Sam loved the balloons and we've been talking "birthday" a lot. It's a week-long celebration.

I ran today in the rain/wind combo, tree limbs falling at my feet. Cool! I stopped at the corner grocery, where they stack everything a la Sleeping With The Enemy. It's perfect, not one single can out of order. I could take a nap in one of their aisles.

My right foot is killing me because of running hills. I've been making Matt push it and stretch it. The first time he did it, he washed his hands afterward. Tonight, he said, "Are we doing your foot thing tonight? I'm over here mentally preparing for it."

Hilarious.

Back to the Books

I've been reading a lot, again. I finished Loving Frank, about the torrid affair between Frank Lloyd Wright and Mamah Borthwick Cheney. So good (and it was) that I had nightmares for two nights afterward. The "surprise ending" was quite a surprise, indeed.

Right now (and with this I mean 2 minutes ago), I'm reading Eat Pray Love, which is apparently written by my soul-sister, except she has no fear and she's published 3 books and used to write for GQ.

Do I have fear, or am I just too busy (and with this I mean too lazy)?

Sam was sick all week, including fever. Karis is dead meat. I witnessed E.B. biting Sam right in front of me too. E. B. will not be around long. I took Sam back to school Friday and he did great. Karis still had a runny nose, so I made sure to say loudly, "Oh, look, Karis, you still have a runny nose." The teacher said, "Oh, I heard that Sam was sick...I'm so sorry." Yeah, whatever.

When I picked Sam up, he smiled at me and ran (and with this I mean ran) across the room to a little sink in the wall. He looked at me, putting his hands into the sink with no running water, showing me his new skill. Hand washing. That's great, sweetie (heart beats faster because I'm so in love).

He'll be one this week, and I'll be 29 again. That is so weird. I was almost too young to have a kid.
I have his birthday party planned from start to finish. I'm actually taking a night off with my girlfriends the night before and heading to Lake Monroe, near Bloomington, for some wine and conversation. My friends are all readers, and they love wine. Can't beat it with a stick.

Matt is chatting with his best friend Christian in California right now. Christian's father and I have a mutual crush on one another. He owned a French restaurant in Orange County, and I'm the only woman among Matt's friends who could talk some smack with him (with this, I mean French cuisine). ; )

Breaking out the Nikon

We went to Penrod this weekend with Matt's folks. Saw lots of good art, lots of interesting people. I bought a new painting...it's so gorgeous and I pick it up this week. Took lots of good photos, too.

Great weekend with the in-laws, and my brother Jason came in 309 (out of over 2,000) in the Ironman triathlon in Madison, WI today. Our family tracked him online all day! : )

Sam is sick for the first time! He started school Friday at the church down the street, and this little snot-nosed girl, Karis, breathed on him. I'm so pissed. I whispered to Karis when I met her: Hi. I'm keeping my eye on you. Matt said he has his eye on "E.B."

Parenting is a blast!

The Gardening Set

Today, after Sam's meet-n-greet at his new school (Fridays only), I bought him a gardening set for $1 at CVS. I showed Matt tonight and he said, "Jill, the boy already has a vacuum, and now a gardening set; we're starting him off on the wrong foot, wouldn't you say?"

Laughter.

New SLR

I bought a sweet new camera this weekend - a Nikon D-60. I know, I know, I spoil myself.

Matt was walking down our wee side street this weekend with Sam. He stopped and bought chocolate somewhere, and shared with Samuel. He said that he kept seeing Sam's little arm coming up, out of the stroller, wanting more pieces.

Mmm, mmm, love.

I've kept a journal of pretty much every major life-moment in Sam's first year. I'm so bloody organized.

I ran this morning before Sam (and Matt, ahem) got up. I love running in the early pre-autumn mornings, when the wind is cool and the leaves are heavy with dew. Our neighborhood is full of hills, too, which is a bonus.

The Wit

My dad visited my grandmother in the nursing home last weekend, and apologized for not having stopped at the bank before he got there. Their conversation:

Dad: Mom, take this $10 - I forgot to stop and get you more cash.

Grandmother: No, no, I'm not taking your money, sweetie.

Dad: Please, take it; it's no big deal.

Grandmother: No, honey, I don't even need money here.

Dad: Please take it.

Grandmother: Oh, all right. Next time don't forget to stop at the bank first.